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Originally written for the Spiritual Haven on April 23, 2019
So, let me start with saying: this read is not meant to belittle or offend any life choice when it comes to being religious or spiritual because it is absolutely possible to both simultaneously or one and not the other. Do what you do, I love you either way. Everything is not as black and white as it seems. The reason we have the color gray is because there is always a gray area.
I wanted to write about this because I have had multiple experiences of judgment when it came to the way I have my relationship with The Most High. I have been called a devil worshiper, evil, witch-- you name it. And it is all because of the way I present my love for God. I recently pretty much got attacked while attending bible study at a church, which really made me question many things about Christianity and religion in general.
Little background story: I was raised somewhere in between Pentecostal and Baptist… with a hint of Buddhism and Islam. I’ve seen the church runners, the screamers, the roll-on-the-floor holy ghosts. I’ve heard and sung all the hymns, got baptized, ate the body and drunk the blood of Jesus. I’ve had to stop and pray to the East, fast, and abstain from pork. I’ve had to meditate, learn the laws of life, and practice peace despite my flesh. Even with experiencing all of these practices so young, I always questioned why. Why is this the way to God?
Being that my parents were also huge on knowing what blood we had running through our veins, I also was huge on African and Native American history. So, I found out about the significance of crystals, incense and sage to our culture and immediately it got shut down because it was “the unknown.” The uncharted territory. The place only the fearless go. Stray from the roots of religion in that home? Hell no! Perhaps my young mind wasn’t ready for my truth yet. So I pushed it all to my subconscious until nearing adulthood.
Before I go any further, I do not at all want to sound unappreciative for my foundation. I’m thankful for it. It molded me into the woman I am, the lightworker I am, and the witch I am today. I am older now, waking up to how people are, how religion is, how the world is.
I chose to lean more towards spirituality and be a spiritual human because the constricts of religion are too small for what God needs me to accomplish on this planet. What I am, what I have to do, is bigger than religion. I did not find God in the walls of the church. I found Him in me. I found Him in solitude. I found Him in the stranger that bought my coffee in Starbucks. I found Him in the sweet way the wind blows in the spring, in love, in life, in the rain, in the sun, in the moon. I draw energy from everything He put energy into. I found God everywhere. I’ve gotten more peace and closer to God alone, with my crystals, Palo Santos, and meditation.
We all want the same thing-- peace, and to love and be loved. Whatever tools you use to get there, religion, meditation, whatever, DO THAT. One thing that is consistent through ALL religions is you are to love God, love yourself, and love others. The wording may be different but it’s all the same. In my opinion, there is no right or wrong way or method to have a relationship with God. And no one religion is the right religion. At some point, they cross over to each other.
Our paths may different, but the goal is the same. And I apologize if you’re afraid of what I am and what I do, or even the tools I use, but knowledge is infinite. And it’s okay to disagree with someone, but be respectful. I don’t care if you think what I do is wrong, but be respectful when approaching it. Now, I am known to be chillin ‘til I ain’t. And just because I burn this sage doesn’t mean I am peaceful 24/7. I am a work in progress. I’ll light you up with the same match I ignite my incense with.
So, bruja I am bitch, and don’t you ever forget it.
Awwww look at 22 year old me.
-- Nyxie Moon